I worked for a year as a case manager (mental health rehabilitation specialist) at a start-up transitional housing facility for youth ages 18-21. What I learned there was invaluable to my development as a therapist and social worker. Why I was so successful working there with the youth was because I am good at listening, asking questions, and setting realistic goals for the youth.

More importantly, I never took an overly authoritative role with the youth. They are used to adults telling them what to do and usually nobody listens to them. In some settings it is appropriate for adults to be authoritative (parents, teachers, directors, etc) but not when you are their case manager and here is why: In order to have influence or to be able to give guidance to someone you must have a relationship with this individual first. Usually they haven't come to you for help, you have been paid to help manage a case load of youths who don't want another person telling them what to do. Getting paid to work with the youth does not constitute a relationship and neither does being older.

If you want to help the youth, you need to get to know them on an individual basis and start building a relationship with them and then trust. You need to ask open-ended questions and be real. Find out what their interests are and how they spend their day.

Once this kind of interaction has occurred then you can ask them to sit down with you and set a goal, which is something they want to work towards. Remember to keep it specific. Going to school and getting a job is not specific enough. What do they want to learn in school? What kind of job do they want to get? If they cannot think of something constructive to work on then you may have to compromise. Help them with something else if they promise to do something you pick that is constructive. That way everyone is happy. Make sure not to set too many goals at one time and keep it simple.

The ultimate goal of being a case manager for youth is that you teach them how to be self sufficient, make good choices, and build a support system so when you are gone they have people around them that they can rely on and that care about them. If you just tell them what to do every day they won't learn how to think for themselves or ever become self sufficient. You have to be realistic and assume that an 18 year-old will make mistakes and will not be able to handle everything perfectly in his or her life (finances, relationships, school, etc). When they do make mistakes it is your relationship and the trust that you built with them that will lead them back to you for advice and help. Being a consistent adult in a young persons life who has not had consistency nor had adults listen to them makes the difference.

Now down to the nittty gritty.
One mistake I've made was to get too personal with the youth about my own life. As a case manager, you should only divulge what you are comfortable with, and nothing more. You must also remember that you are there for them and not there to talk about yourself.

Remember to set boundaries with the people you are working with and be consistent. If you don't have boundaries no one will respect you and you will get walked upon.

Another thing I learned was to NEVER loan out your personal money to anyone. This is always asking for trouble. You are not their bank and you should not feel guilty for saying no. Even if you loan out one dollar the word will get out that you gave someone bus fare and you will wish you never did. Don't ever use your hard earned money because you will resent it later on. Go the long way around and put in a request for a bus pass for the youth instead.

Some mistakes I saw other case managers do was try to yell at--or boss around--the youth before they got to know them. How can you know what's best for someone without getting to know them? Why would they listen to you if they don't even know who you are?

Another mistake I saw with new case managers was that they tried to be the youths' best friend by going shopping with them, going to the movies with them, and gossiping with them and their friends. This doesn't work, because when you do this you are viewed as an equal or friend to the youth and not as someone who can offer assistance or who is a mentor.